Be Yourself: Life, Advice and Rants

Peoples opinions of me make me paranoid. Do they like me? Am I annoying to them? What do they like in a person? All theses questions go through my mind when starting somewhere new or interacting with people I have never met before. Starting school, more secondary/high school, is the time when we begin to understand ourselves. It is also the time when we make new friends. I used to always wonder how I should act in a way that people would find more socially desirable and would appeal to them more. Over years of new experiences I have finally come to the conclusion of how to do this, just be yourself.  

Humans have a natural desire to be liked and personally, I always strive for acceptance by peers. Your only going to find the people you'll connect with the best by being who you are and doing the things you love. I have 3 ways in which you can find out how to be yourself:

1. Find yourself.
You can't be yourself if you don't know, understand, and accept yourself first. It should be your primary goal to find this out.The best way to do that is trail and error, so find things you wouldn't normally do and see if you like it. Its the best way forward.

2. Avoid fixating on the past.
One of the most unhealthy approaches is to make a decision that who you are is defined by a moment of time, after which you spend the rest of your life trying to still be that person from the past rather than someone who is still you but grows with experience. Just remember a definition excludes the possibility for change so let yourself grow, improve and become wiser.

3. Relax.
Stop worrying about the worst that could happen, especially in social situations. So what if you trip over flat ground? Or get food on your face? Or accidentally head butt your date when leaning in for a kiss?  If they don't like it, they aren't the right people for you. Just find people that would laugh but then also help you back up just to laugh a little bit more.

So you know what, you play the sport that isn't stereotyped to your gender, you kiss whoever you want to kiss whether you be the opposite sex or same sex and you follow whatever religion you believe in. We cannot spend our lives pleasing others if it means not making ourselves happy. You are the most important person to you, remember that. If someone tells you what you enjoy, believe or love is wrong just laugh. Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind. To be yourself in a world constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.

I live everyday as myself and trust me, it has given me the amazing friends I have the pleasure of spending my life with. It may take time but eventually it will be worth it. A friend will be someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself and don't ever let someone tell you that you can't be exactly who you are.

As Oscar Wilde said "Be yourself; everyone else is taken."