In it’s simplest forms, the friendzone is a social construct that describes the rejection of someone by someone else who just wants to be friends with them.
So why is it so bad?
The entire concept of the friendzone exists to shame and blame women because of rejection. The friendzone suggests that women owe something to men who are kind to them, like a debut. And when men don't receive this ‘payment’ they are somehow mistreated.
The idea that men are only kind to women to be in a relationship with them is repulsive, but unfortunately it seems to be surprisingly common. You’re angry you’ve been rejected? Well I’m sure she’s angry that your whole friendship was an act with the sole purpose of getting in her pants.
Men shouldn't expect women to want to date them because they are nice to them. Just because you are actually a decent human being to somebody doesn't mean you are going to marry them and run off into the sunset together.
What does ‘nice’ mean anyway? Showering her in compliments? Offering conversations every evening? Always being there for her? If a girl was like that to a boy, she would be dubbed a ‘freak’. Well sorry boys, but you're no better. This isn't romantic, this is creepy.
These mentalities that men should be rewarded for being nice are common, another one being that ‘nice guys finish last’. I cannot even begin to explain how ridiculous this one is. First of all, it makes no logical sense. Why would nice guys finish last? Because woman are too stupid to realise what a lovely, charming young man you are? I don’t think so.
These concepts are disgusting. They shame women for saying no and pressure them to say yes, as if it wasn't already hard enough to reject someone. Now along with the guilt of making someone feel bad, women also have to deal with society calling them names because they aren't attracted to someone, something that they don't have any control over.
Not only do these ideas shame women, but they also teach the wrong things to men. Instead of the problem being on your end, it’s the girls fault. A man doesn't even have to be nice to a woman to be friendzoned, he just has to be rejected by her for whatever reason. It’s only called the friendzone because the idea of a woman telling a man ‘no’ is so taboo, it has to come with a ‘but we can still be friends’. These ideas are toxic, and add to the long list of things that bring up young boys thinking that the sun shines out of their penises.
The friendzone is not real. It is a petty construct that make whiny men feel better about themselves. So girls, instead of friendzoning boys, funzone them. Put them in the kiddy park so they can cry with all the other babies when they don’t get what they want.
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